A father reared five beautiful children for thirty years. He never questioned his paternity.
One day, his eldest daughter presented him the results of an ancestry test. It came out he was not her biological father.
Reddit user Needadvicedesperate and his wife were high school sweethearts. The couple had five lovely children, and everything seemed great.
But over 30 years after raising his eldest daughter, he discovered she was not his child. His difficulty began when his daughter took an ancestry test.
She told him the results in private, and her father could tell she was devastated, so he decided to investigate.
The original poster (OP) stated that he never questioned his wife’s loyalty. However, the ancestry test results shook his faith in her.
But, before he could process the news further, he consoled his daughter.
He explained: “Of course, the first thing I did was reassure her that no matter what, she’s my daughter, and I’ll always love her unconditionally.” The OP and his daughter doubted the accuracy of the results.
They agreed to do a formal paternity test together. The findings arrived, and this time it was clear that he was not her biological father. He was sh0cked.
For more than 30 years, he had believed that his eldest daughter was his. The discovery crushed him, and he collapsed in front of her.
He added: “The combination of finding out about my wife’s infidelity and how upset I was making my daughter by how I was reacting.
I really wish I had kept it in for her sake, but I didn’t.” The OP could not keep himself together. He decided to put the other children to the test and requested that they meet with him alone.
However, he omitted his youngest teen daughter from this since he anticipated the worst. He felt it would be wrong to tell his 14-year-old daughter about it.
He still wanted to know how long his wife had cheated on him. Given her history of infidelity, he determined to work past it. The OP explained: “We tell the other three what has happened.
I reassure them that I love them unconditionally and that I’ll always be their dad, but that I need to know how long this has been going on.”
Until he told them the results, the other kids thought he was their biological father.
They were upset, however, that he had been broken, and they decided to assist him by being tried themselves. The paternity tests were performed on the OP’s three other children, who are 30, 28, and 24 years old.
The results proved that none of them were his offspring. Added to that, each of them had three separate fathers. The news demoralized him.
The individual emphasized that if he kept the truth from his daughter now, she would find out in the worst conceivable way later. He believed his wife was having many ᴀғғᴀɪʀs.
He was at a lost for words. The reality affected him in ways he never expected. After much consideration, the OP confronted his wife. He assumed she would confess the truth and ask pardon.
When he told his wife about the tests, she dismissed them, claiming that the accuracy could be flawed. She’d even guilt-tripped him, saying: “We’ve been together since high school.
Do you seriously not trust me?” The OP remained unfazed by her answers. He was unsure how to reassure his children that nothing had changed between them.
He was concerned that his emotions might cause people to question his assurances. Most importantly, he did not want his youngest daughter to learn the truth until she was older.
He stated he couldn’t live without his wife and resorted to the Reddit community for suggestions on how to save their marriage. He received very enthusiastic comments.
One Redditor sympathized with the OP, saying it was a horrible way to find out the truth, and added: “She had multiple ᴀғғᴀɪʀs and multiple children with multiple men and can’t even own it when caught.
But I never want to be like that person who just says leave. It’s a lot. There’s a lot we don’t know. This is your life.” The OP responded by saying that he could no longer hide the truth from his youngest daughter.
He stated she could feel deceived if she discovered it later. He asked for further advice, explaining: “My top priority right now is her wellbeing.
Everyone else is an adult and can handle whatever happens, but she is still young, and I worry that it will seriously negatively affect her development.”
User pancakeday advised the OP, stating that if he did not tell his daughter while the other children were aware, she would be hurt when she found out.
The guy insisted that if he kept the truth from his daughter now, she would find out in the worst conceivable way later.
The Redditor added: “You’re giving your wife the opportunity to tell her god knows what, and right now, you don’t know who your wife really is or what she’s capable of.
She’s not the woman you thought you married. You need to protect your kids from your wife, not the truth.” Some people suggested the OP to tell his children that he loved them and wanted time to consider.
Redditor Hanh2 stated that he was never too old for anything and that he deserved better. The individual stated that she hoped the OP did not stay with his wife because he felt too old to go on.
The OP stated that he had centered his entire life around his wife. He explained that he could not envisage life with or without her. After reviewing the topics in his post, he restricted his options and decided to get second testing done.
He decided to tell his youngest daughter the truth without forcing her to take a paternity test. He further stated that if his wife’s attitude worsened, he would file for divorce.
Most significantly, he learned that his bond with his children was more essential than his paternity.
